I was in high school. We were all in P.E class (physical education).
Two guys in particular were trying to pick on me, insult me, and verbally abuse me for their own amusement. They expected me to just sit there and not do anything. To be their little pawn, slave, or play thing.
Eventually I’d had enough and I punched one of them in the face. In this case I gave a fuck about what they were saying. Though I admit they asked for it. That was the last time those guys in particular ever tried bullying me ever again.
One time I was working part time doing warehouse work. Which really means cleaning chocolate off the floor, sweeping up, a bit of manual work like moving boxes, and housekeeping. The company is one of the biggest manufacturers of chocolate biscuits in the UK.
The first day I started everything seemed decent, meaning the people and their attitudes. I was introduced to a few people I’d be working with. Everything was cool.
A few weeks into the job I discovered more people didn’t like me than I thought. And even worse, some were blatantly racist towards me. Not openly racist but racist in silence.
One of my work colleagues said to me – “that African guy over there, he looks like a black pig doesn’t he?”.
You can only imagine what was going through my mind knowing he had the audacity to express his racism right in front of me. Especially knowing I’m black myself. I won’t lie I wanted to punch him in the face and teach him a lesson, but I was smarter than that…..
2 months later after these incidents (including other incidents along the way) I was made redundant by the company.
Remember those guys who didn’t like me? (Probably because I wasn’t as negative or pessimistic as they were) Those guys were spreading bullshit about me to the supervisor, and like a fucking idiot he believed everything he was told.
Probably because they’ve worked together for a long time, and the “new” guy can’t possibly be telling the truth, right?
So I was made redundant right after the supervisor yelled right in front of me as If he was talking to his 5 year old son and he was my dad (I don’t have one).
I wanted to punch him in the face similar to the high school incident I mentioned earlier. But by then I was smarter than that.
So I let it go, left, was as angry as a mother grizzly bear who’s cubs are being threatened, and then I had an epiphany. A moment of realization. Or to put it simply, I no longer gave a fuck.
I no longer gave a fuck about….
- Wanting to pursue my dreams.
- Starting my own businesses like I’ve always been dying to do.
- Wanting to do the things I believe in, instead of what society expects of me.
- The opinions of other people in regards to my professional life.
- Outside criticism about any decisions, choices I make. Or what path I choose to follow.
- The fear that had been holding me back before being made redundant.
- Being unconventional, unpopular, and doing what the F I felt was right for me.
- Leaving behind the bullshit ideals and beliefs society had rammed down my throat.
- Not wanting to go to college, knowing it wasn’t for me and I had no business being there.
I had been doing things up until being made redundant to make other people happy. I had being doing things because hey, that’s what 99% of the population says you must do.
I had being doing things because everybody else was doing it. If everyone is doing it, it must be the right thing to do, right? And even if it isn’t, it’s the safer option!
I had being wasting my precious time on unimportant things like studying mechanics, music tech, considering graphic design, among other things.
My graphic design teacher was right, I was never interested in doing it long term. I wasn’t passionate about it and had no purpose for it. She could see it written all over my face and my demeanor.
I had a list of people I was trying to make happy, and my name wasn’t even on the list. How foolish I was indeed. You could say I fucked up.
You see, it’s all these experiences (plus more) that lead me to no longer giving a fuck. And ever since I’ve no longer gave a fuck.…
- I’ve been immensely happier than I’ve ever been in my entire life.
- My days are filled with passion and purpose.
- I now know what it is I want to do with my life.
- I now know what it is I want and desire.
- I now know the end goal, the thing I’m striving for.
- I know where I ultimately wanna live, spend my life, as well as the lifestyle I wanna live.
- I know who I’m doing this for, other than myself.
- I know who I want to help, how I want to help.
- I know what fulfills me, I’m more self aware, and look forward to everyday.
When you no longer give a fuck wonderful things start happening in your life. One way or another. Things you never even thought possible, and even things you would have never expected. Especially the level of happiness and purpose it brings into your life.
At this point there’s really only 1 more gap to fill in my life, and that’s prosperity in all areas of my life. Finances in particular, and a relationship so I guess that makes 2.
The sooner you stop giving a fuck, the sooner you can drive your life in the right direction.
I don’t know what it is in your life that you’re giving too much of a damn about. I’m not telepathic. But whatever that thing is, let it go as soon as possible. It’s the only way you’ll start to head in the right direction in all areas of your life.
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