Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions. – Dalai Lama
Almost daily you can log in to yahoo answers and see a parade of unhappy people…
Desperate for that “magic potion” to cure their lack of happiness. And yahoo answers is obviously not the only place on the internet filled with people searching for answers.
I can understand and relate to these people though, and of course, I can relate to you, too.
It’s not easy to be happy when you’re viewing it the wrong way. Happiness cannot be found, regardless of what anybody or any “expert” has told you. Happiness is NOT external.
You can’t exactly look in the yellow pages or on a map, and “find out” where happiness is. No GPS signal is gonna lead you to it.
And no other person on the planet is gonna open their hands and “hand it” to you. And you certainly can’t buy happiness at your local supermarket!
Here are the top 5 obstacles stopping you from being happy, and what to do about it.
1. You’re too busy looking for it.
As I mentioned briefly, you can’t find happiness. It is NOT a product. It’s not external. It cannot be FOUND, and NOBODY can give it to you. The first obstacle is your perspective of happiness. Happiness starts from the inside.
Dig deep and shovel out whatever it is that’s causing your unhappiness. And realize YOU are in full control of your happiness.
2. You’re too busy giving it away.
When you donate your happiness to another person, you put yourself at massive risk. Think about it. If you truly believe you can’t be happy without that one particular person, you’re fucked.
Why? Because for example – If you’re in a relationship with that person, and they decide to break up and leave you, your happiness will leave too.
“Please come back” I NEED you” “I can’t live without you”. This is truly the worst position you can put yourself in.
NEVER, and I mean NEVER put your happiness in someone else’s hands. Happiness starts with you.
Detach your happiness from the person, or the people, the friends, etc.
Take responsibility and begin to realize it all starts with YOU.
And only YOU can make yourself happy, not others. It may take time to rid of these habits, but If you’re determined to change your thoughts you’ll be on your way in no time.
3. You believe money brings happiness.
Money has never made man happy, nor will it, there is nothing in its nature to produce happiness. The more of it one has the more one wants. – Benjamin Franklin
I’m not rich yet, but I’ve had my share of money to know that money doesn’t bring you happiness.
You might “believe” it does because of all the rich and happy celebrities you see on TV, but that ain’t how it works.
If a person is already happy within themselves, then money will amplify it a little.
But If you’re depressed and unhappy with your life, money will only multiply your stress and problems.
A global case study was done on this very topic. You can check it out at livescience.
Detach your happiness from money and take control.
If you really believe money will bring you happiness then just wait until you lose it. You’ll be depressed not happy, and that’s why you can’t attach happiness to money.
It might take LOTS of work and tons of self discipline, but it can be done. Or maybe reading this is enough for you to realize and change. It all boils down to you.
4. You believe “getting drunk” makes you happy.
This one is dangerously backwards. It’s the total opposite of the actual truth. You use alcohol as a means of escape to avoid all of your daily problems.
And because of the “high” you get off drinking, you associate that “good feeling” with being happy. It’s basic psychology.
Happiness depends upon ourselves. – Aristotle
You’re unhappy because you’re no different to a hamster on a wheel.
Instead of using your brain, you’re just doing the same thing week in week out. And wondering why you’re constantly “depressed” as you scratch your head.
Face your issues head on and take a look in the mirror. You are RESPONSIBLE.
Once you accept this you’ll notice the difference in your attitude and your happiness almost immediately. And If you don’t, then get to work and change up your habits.
You can read up about how to discipline yourself here.
5. You’re a human doormat.
Don’t be a doormat, you deserve the best. Don’t settle for second best, raise your standards and choose to be with someone who will treat you with the same respect and consideration you would show them. – Roshida Rowe
If you accidentally tattooed “I’m a human doormat, feel free to walk over me” to your chest, It’s not to late. Not only can tattoos be removed, but so can your “doormat” mentality.
I don’t care If the people walking all over you are friends, family, or partner, that’s NOT EXCUSABLE. It’s wrong.
You need to stand UP for yourself and take responsibility. Grow a back bone and stop letting people shit on your happiness. Unless you enjoy being a human toilet…..
I hope these top 5 obstacles stopping you from being happy have woken you up, even if it’s a little.
The choice is yours. Take back your happiness right NOW because you deserve it.