“Happiness is something we reap from the seeds we sow. Plant misery seeds and that us what you reap.” ― Stephen Richards
And in this case, misery seeds are unintentionally planted by the things you believe in.
Your beliefs have the power to uplift you, destroy you, make you happy or create unhappiness. Whether you’re aware of that fact or not.
So my question to you is – what are you believing?
And have you ever second-guessed your beliefs?
Have you ever considered your beliefs to be the cause of unhappiness in your life?
Get rid of these 10 dangerous beliefs that are keeping you unhappy, and things will start to change. Little by little.
1. “If I do what I believe in, people will dislike me”
I know, I know. The pressure of society, your parents, your friends, teachers, and even naysayers can be overwhelming.
I get that. But are you really willing to sacrifice your own happiness for the sake of others? That’s a serious question you need to ask yourself.
And I’ve been there before. I was once afraid to do what I believed was right for ME. And that all changed in 2012. I had enough of it.
It was time to do what I believed in, and it was time to do what made ME happy. Because it’s ME who matters.
The same goes for you. People will dislike you, your family might dislike your decisions, and even society might disagree, but SO WHAT?
Your beliefs belong to you, and nobody else has the RIGHT to be mad at you for it.
If they are, it’s only because they see you’re not afraid to do what you believe is right, since they’re too scared to do that themselves.
That didn’t stop people like –
- Sara Blakely.
- Bill Gates.
- 50 Cent.
- P Diddy.
- Nicki Minaj.
- Grant Cardone.
- Michelle Mone.
- Richard Reed.
- Richard Branson.
And so many other people. It hasn’t stopped me either. So don’t dare to let it stop you.
2. “If I fail at school, I’ll never be successful”
The things that have been most valuable to me I did not learn in school. – Will Smith
This is a dangerous belief, and a load of bullshit to say the least. If you fail at school, college, or Uni, you can still be successful. It’s not like your lifeline is attached to failure.
Look at Bill gates, Steve Jobs, and many other successful people who dropped out or failed at school. Successful rappers and musicians are great examples.
So lets say you do fail at school (or have failed already), what are your options? You could….
- Bitch about it.
- Cry about it.
- Be negative.
- Beat yourself up.
- Stress yourself out.
- Over exaggerate the situation.
- Put yourself down.
Or you could….
- Start reading books, online courses, etc.
- Read blogs, how to guides, and find solutions online.
- Focus on self education.
- Start a business.
- Teach yourself skills that will pay you (like Photoshop).
- Become a freelancer.
- Pursue another career.
- Pursue another course (maybe online).
- Pay for a mentor or a coach to help you.
There are many ways to be successful.
People sell battery chargers on eBay and make more than a living. And I assure you school didn’t teach them that.
Don’t be dumbed down by society and believe that formal education is the ONLY way forward. It’s not. And anyone who suggests it to you is brainwashed.
3. “I’m too old to pursue my dreams”
You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream. – C. S. Lewis
The funny thing is, most of us tell ourselves we’re too old when we’re actually still young. Even at 50 years old it’s not too late.
As long as you’re mobile, healthy, and more than able to get it done, you CAN pursue your dreams and be successful.
The founder of Walmart was in his 50’s when he first started. The founder of Mc Donald’s was also in his 50’s as well.
In fact, the majority of successful people don’t succeed until they’re in their 40’s and 50’s.
It’s the minority of people who are successful in their 20’s and 30’s.
So get rid of that faulty belief and wake up! Age hardly matters.
4. “If I break up with my partner, I’ll be lonely”
Another dangerous belief that’ll keep you unhappy. This is especially true when you’re in a toxic relationship.
Here’s what you need to ask yourself.
Would I rather be single and happy, or be in a toxic relationship and be unhappy?
Using the “lonely” excuse will only keep you sad, depressed, angry, and emotional. None of those are good for a relationship that’s not working.
5. “Nothing good ever happens to me”
You cannot have a positive life and a negative mind. – Joyce Meyer
It’s no joke. You can’t expect to have a positive life with a negative mind, followed by negative beliefs.
As long as you believe “nothing good ever happens to me”, when GOOD things DO happen to you, you won’t notice it. It’ll be invisible to you. As if you’re walking around blindfolded!
And the reason for that is simple. If you believe “nothing good ever happens to me”, how can anything “good” happen to you?
Change – “nothing good ever happens to me”, to – “good things only happen because of me”.
6. “If I quit college, my parents will be furious”
This belief may be true, but it doesn’t change the fact that it’ll keep you unhappy. Your parents don’t rule your life, shouldn’t rule your life and can’t rule your life.
If you continue to do something that makes you unhappy because your parents won’t approve, you’ll not only stress yourself out, but you’ll end up wasting a lot of time.
If college isn’t for you, and you don’t need college to get to where you want, drop out. If your parents aren’t willing to support your decisions, that’s on them, not on you.
Just be sure to have a plan as to what you’re going to do if you drop out. And do what makes sense to YOU.
7. “Guys only like girls who look like models”
Stereotypes do exist, but we have to walk through them. – Forest Whitaker
In other words, believing guys want girls who look like models is false. It’s nothing but a lie that’s pushed by the media.
I have to say for all you ladies out there, I don’t blame you. But wake up! If you think like that, which is false, how can you ever expect to be happy?
8. “Girls only want guys who are muscular”
This is also another myth. A myth that has many guys drowning in unhappiness. As long as you believe that, it’ll be impossible to swim to the shore of happiness!
Flush it out of your system and stop fooling yourself.
9. “I can’t be myself because people will judge me”
Why live a lie for the rest of your life just because you’re afraid of being judged? Is it worth staying in your shell to create a false sense of protection?
When a caterpillar is in it’s cocoon state, do you think it’s afraid of what the world might think before it breaks out of it’s shell? Of course not.
It becomes a butterfly regardless. That’s the way YOU need to see it.
Be yourself regardless of how the world will judge you.
Don’t be afraid to express who you are, what you represent, what you believe in and what you do.
Let your personality shine. And those who love you, support you, and are inspired by the real you will appreciate it. Nobody else matters.
10. “Compared to (fill in the blank) I’m worthless”
I generally find that comparison is the fast track to unhappiness. No one ever compares themselves to someone else and comes out even. Nine times out of ten, we compare ourselves to people who are somehow better than us and end up feeling more inadequate. – Jack Canfield
You’re as worthless as you believe you are. And the fastest way to believing it is by comparing yourself to others.
If you –
- Compare your financial situation.
- Your talents.
- Your skills.
- Your ability.
- Your circumstances.
- Your potential.
- Your success.
- Your life.
- Your happiness.
Or anything else of the sort, you’re destined for a life of misery. Like the first line of the quote above said –
I generally find that comparison is the fast track to unhappiness.
And it’s true. So the first and only step you need to take to avoid that is focus on yourself.
Want to improve your level of happiness? Focus on yourself.
Want to feel more attractive? Focus on yourself.
Want to become a better writer? Focus on yourself.
Because the truth is, the only way it gets better is by focusing on self improvement. I did an article on self improvement called – Why Smart People Commit To Self Improvement Everyday.
One of the reasons is to make progress in a particular area of your life.
I challenge you to swap comparing yourself with focusing on yourself. I challenge you to stop comparing yourself and start focusing on improving yourself.
You’ll be surprised at how much of a big difference it makes. 🙂
So to break down this post. –
- Do what you believe in no matter what.
- Stop associating formal education with success.
- Stop associating age with the ability to be successful.
- Happiness and staying in toxic relationships don’t mix.
- Realize you ARE more than good enough.
- Your parents aren’t in control of your life and your happiness, YOU are.
- Guys like girls of all shapes and sizes.
- Girls like guys of all shapes and sizes.
- Be yourself and be judged anyway.
- Compare yourself to nobody and focus on yourself.
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